I dig and I WHAT?

OK, so it seems people just aren’t getting Kai’s bumper sticker joke. Look at this link. It’s a way of showing support for whatever it is that you do by saying that you’ll vote for whoever supports your interests most. Oh never mind.

On the topic of voting, here’s a 2 second breakdown for those of you whose interest in the election peaks at “why is it called a donkey vote”?

First, VOTE MINOR PARTIES FIRST. When they inevitably get knocked out early, your vote goes to one of the two major parties ANYWAY depending on which you put before the other, but every vote is worth about $2 to a minor party. If they get even one seat, they get resources to fund their campaign. So VOTE A MINOR PARTY OR TWO FIRST.

If you’re bored already, just skip to the Kai How to Vote Card at the bottom.

The Greens. They love the environment, so much so that the number one saviour of greenhouse emissions (nuclear power) they are 100% against. In every other aspect they’re a pretty good choice though. They’re progressive because they support pro gay/lesbian marriage, they’re pro-choice, they want to increase foreign aid, and they support drug harm minimisation.

Citizens Electoral Council. They’re mostly anti-globalisation, anti-GST, pro-union. They have a strong zero tolerance on drug use position, which seems a bit short sighted, and they seem to have an anti-gay sentiment. In other words, tending towards conservative.

Democratic Labor Party. Only one step up from the Family First party. Religious zealots, anti-gay, anti-everything really. GST. Choice (abortions). Globalism. AWA’s. Drugs. The upside is that they’ve got an interest in making better educations more available.

Democrats. My choice, sure they were anti-GST and ended up backing which allowed it to go through, and Cheryl Kernot kinda stabbed them in the back, but hey, even though they’re anti-nuclear (even uranium mining which is a great export for Australia), they’re socially progressive enough to tip the balance. The other downside is that all their policy documents are in PDF, and for that they should all be shot. So what makes them great? Well for one, they’re balanced, they’ve got a policy on EVERYTHING, not just a few key issues. 25 steps to a healthy environment. 25 steps to a great health system. Equality for women. Better access to justice. They’ve even thought about people with disabilities – perhaps the most neglected of our population. Oh and they put Family First second last on their how to vote cards, “There are too many Christians in parliament and they don’t reflect the make-up of modern Australia, Democrats leader Lyn Allison said today”.

Family First. This cracks me up: “FAMILY FIRST is alarmed that no one in the Government is responsible for what our children see on television.” Really? Well, perhaps parents should enforce their own standards rather than expecting the government to cram their own agendas down everyone else’s throats. “FAMILY FIRST believes we should be doing everything possible to ban Internet Pornography and protect our children from this vile material”. Yes, because every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten. It’s porn, BIG DEAL. It’s not anywhere NEAR as evil as telling gays that they’re going to hell. You can’t BAN anything on the Internet anyway unless you want to live in a fascist country like China. Why does Family First hate freedom?

Labor and Liberal. They’re mostly the same really. If you’re sick of John Howard, vote Labour – at least you’re not going to get Beazley this time around. If you’re worried that Labour will pull their usual trick of flushing the surplus down the drain with less-than-effective projects, then vote Liberal. Whoever you vote for, you’re going to wish the other party won in 3 years anyway.

Kai’s suggestion for upper house voting in the seat of Hotham:

1. Democrats
2. Greens
3. Labor
4. Liberal
5. Citizens Electoral Council
6. Democratic Labor Party
7. Family First

And in the Senate, just do a single 1 for the Democrats unless you want to number every one of the 414 boxes below the line.

Lastly, Kai’s not anti-Christian. True, they can stare scientific evidence in the eye and say “nup, the world is so not more than 3000 years old”, but that makes them happy and so that’s OK. Just don’t take faith and try to pretend it’s got scientific method behind it by calling it “intelligent design”, and don’t try to legislate people’s freedoms into the ground, because that stuff pisses Kai off more than trying to get the last bit of vegemite out of the bottom of the kong.